News from the Natural World: Mother Earth has decided to arrest the human race for stealing from nature.
Mother Earth has finally lost it with the human species. Normally she will just stand by and let nature takes its course. She will watch on as all different species naturally vie for oscillating positions of superiority. When one rises, another falls and so on and so on. This relative balance is a key part of the natural order. However she has been forced into action by the greediness of the human race.
She has watched on as humans first began stealing. In the beginning it was the odd extra Sabre Tooth Tiger or Wooly Mammoth. She knew that the humans were taking more than they needed but thought it would work itself out. Then they began taking more and more animals, domesticating them and settling in small settlements. The next 20,000 years went by in the blink of an eye.
When she next glanced back everything had rapidly escalated. You might ask why she hadn’t intervened earlier? Well cosmic entities like Mother Earth have other priorities you know. There are billions of planets all over the known universe and she’s sprinkled life on rather a few. She can’t be selfish and keep her eye on just one of them.
Mother Earth arrests the human race
When she finally got round to looking back at Earth she realised that they’d nicked off with almost everything. They pilfered the earths natural resources, stole nearly all of the oil, coal and natural gases. Not only had they stolen an unprecedented number of species they had begun domesticating them and turning them into bastardised versions of her original creations. On top of that they’d stolen vast amounts of ice from both poles and exterminated the majority of the most incredible animals.