“Orangutans across Borneo start assassinating Government officials”

News from the Natural World: Orangutans all across Borneo have started assassinating Indonesian Government officials.

News from the Natural World: Orangutans across Borneo have started assassinating Indonesian Government officials.

Strange reports have been circulating in the media. They told of Indonesian government officials going missing in the middle of the night. They tell of giant hairy orange arms reaching through windows in the night to steal them away as they slept. Others told of giant orange shadows falling from rooftops onto people walking home late at night. Whispers circulated of a menacing underground militia deliberately targeting corruption across Jakarta and the island of Borneo. But who are these mysterious orange avengers?

The Platypus has gained exclusive access to the leader of this group, Oswald the Orangutan. Oswald and his Orangutan militia have claimed responsibility for the attacks. The assassinations had begun for two reasons. The first was that the Orangutans heard rumours that animals had risen up and waged war on the human race. The second was because they heard that the Indonesian Government was planning on relocating the capital of Indonesia from Jakarta They were moving it, along with a few million people, to primary pristine Bornean rainforest.

Orangutans murder government officials

The Indonesian President Widodo did indeed announce they would be moving the capital city to East Kalimantan on Borneo. This was due to Jakarta rapidly sinking and choking under traffic jams and air pollution. However this will utterly destroy around 1,370 hectares of intact natural forests in the location of the new capital city. But the Government claimed that it will ‘reforest’ these areas. But analysis shows the area is already being devastated by mining, palm oil and logging. Oswald the Orangutan knew that now was the perfect moment to strike. They had no choice but to fight for their survival.

Orangutans government
Good old government always looking out for Orangutans

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