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“Pigeons fed up with rampant gentrification decide to head to the suburbs”

News from the Natural World: Pigeons are fed up with rampant gentrification and decide to head to the suburbs.

News from the Natural World: Pigeons are fed up with rampant gentrification and decide to head elsewhere for a new way of life.

Pigeons all across London have grown increasingly frustrated with the pace of inner-city development. The constant increase of fashionable new eateries, shops, delicatessens and hipster bars has hit never before seen heights. The Pigeons have reported a rapid rise in the number of snooty Voles, aristocratic Foxes and the worst of all, insurance sales-Mice. This process is called gentrification in the human world. Gentrification is a process of changing the character of a neighbourhood through the influx of more affluent residents and businesses. It is a common and controversial topic in politics and in urban planning. More accurately it is the process of renovating a district so that it conforms to middle-class animals taste.

Pigeons
Some Pigeons were accused of being too Middle Class

But this gentrification has outpaced the growth of the Pigeon community. They are often looked down upon by the other animals. Many call them “Sky Rats”, though the Rats aren’t best pleased by the comparison. Others call them disease carriers, even the Cockroaches pile in on them and refer to them as “Flying Dustbin Munchers”. Other animals also truly despise Pigeons. This hatred leads to marginalisation in animal society. They are sent to the worst animal academies. In addition, they suffer great prejudice and discrimination in the job market. Furthermore, they struggle to raise their income to meet the rapid gentrification in the areas they call home. But there was a glimmer of hope for the Pigeons.

Pigeons bloody fed up with gentrification

Pablo was the leader of the London Pigeons. One morning he heard a rumour from a confused and lost Heron. The Heron said that there was a land of glory outside the city. It was green, verdant and there was less competition with other animals. The humans there were even plumper and would cast aside huge amounts of bread and food for hungry birds. They even had gardens with bird tables and lunch halls. It was a place to feel safe, to escape the rapid gentrification of the suburbs. Pablo immediately led his fellow Pigeon brothers and sisters and was about to set off to the suburbs. Just as they were leaving he spotted a Seagull heading into London. This Seagull had just been in the suburbs. Pablo told him of the Pigeons plans but was so excited he flew off before he heard the Seagulls reply…

“Oh well good luck escaping gentrification but it doesn’t get much more Middle Class than the suburbs….”

TAKE ACTION – NOW

Pigeons
Pigeons headed for the dreaded suburbs

Read more articles like this – here

Find out who the Platypus is – here

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