News from the Natural World: More white people are going to be standing in front of animals in a huge new conservation campaign launched by the West.
In the human world, the ‘West’ is a term used to express supposed superiority over other humans. It is an entirely fictional term. Animals have long pointed out that there is no West. This is because the planet is round. In order to have a West, there must be a centre. Well, those plucky humans do have a centre. It just so happens to be right at the heart of the cruellest and most evil entity known to human history. The British Empire. This entity caused incredible amounts of death, genocide and destruction and proudly sits at the centre of this so-called ‘West’.
But one thing that the West is really really good at is coming up with sensible, sensitive and successful conservation ideas. And they’ve got a really innovative new idea for 2021.

For decades the West has sought to address conservation issues and the destruction of the natural world by taking pictures of white people standing in front of animals. They would send huge crews of scientists, explorers, collectors and thieves to foreign countries. In addition, they would take hundreds of pictures of a handsome or attractive white person standing in front of animals. The white person couldn’t be ugly or overweight. Also, they HAD TO BE WHITE. This was the critical point that all of the Western conservation hinged on. You couldn’t just use the passionate locals and citizens of the country in which the animal lived. It would be madness to just show the local guards and rangers who laid down their lives.
The West has said that 2021 will be no different and they will be sending record numbers of white people to stand in front of animals. But the animals have asked why do humans have to be white?