News from the Natural World: A racist human has admitted to having confused feelings when it comes to his stance on Chameleons.
Nigel was your average racist human. Low intellect, insecure ego, violent mind but most importantly as thick as a piece of sh*t. He hated all humans who weren’t white. He’d spent his entire life in the small market town of Boston, in Lincolnshire England. Boston had the highest proportion of Vote Leave in the Brexit Referendum, with more than 75% voting to leave. Alongside this ran a deep vein of racist sentiment, in addition to poverty and deprivation. Nigel was the most racist of all the humans in Boston and prided himself on really hating anyone whose skin wasn’t white. But this all changed one day when Nigel met Colin the Chameleon.
Colin the Chameleon was a huge celebrity in the animal world. He travelled far and wide educating animals on the stupidity of human racism. He would educate the young animals that many humans judged each other on the colour of their skin. Not only would they judge them but they would abuse, punish and even kill based solely on the melanin pigment present in another human. Colin would demonstrate to the animal class the ridiculous nature of this judgement with a simple trick. First he would stand in front of a white board, then a black board. Both times he would change the colour of his skin to match the board behind him. When he heard about the racist human Nigel he knew he had to intervene.
Racist human meets Chameleon
The Platypus managed to arrange a meeting between Nigel the racist human and Colin the Chameleon. At first Nigel started racially abusing Colin. Not only was he not white he was a different species. In addition, Nigel didn’t know what kind of species of animal he was and this lack of knowledge made him feel insecure. This made him even angrier and he started hurling abuse. “P*ss of you bloody green lizard loser!” But then Colin the Chameleon performed his trick. First he stood in front of a blackboard and turned black. Nigel’s racist human eyes boggled with fury, black was his most hated colour. But then, Colin stood in front of the whiteboard and he turned white. Nigel was shocked, this lizard had suddenly turned white. The same colour as Nigel. Nigel’s mind boggled, synapses fired and neurons twinkled. Nigel realised that the colour of your skin was irrelevant and broke down in tears sopping like a baby.
Colin the Chameleon was very pleased with himself, his work was completed for another day.
TAKE ACTION – NOW
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Find out who the Platypus is – here