News from the Natural World: Animals uncover secret to human intelligence by decoding Youtube comment threads.
Animals have long thought to uncover the secret to human intelligence. They knew that they needed to unlock these secrets in order to survive. Animals previously thought that human intelligence derived from the size and processing power of their brains. In addition, the intellectual capability of humans was marked by complex cognitive feats and high levels of motivation and self-awareness. Humans possessed the cognitive abilities to learn, form concepts, understand, apply logic, and reason. Furthermore they have the capacity to recognise patterns, plan, innovate, solve problems. Also they can make decisions, retain information, and use language to communicate. But why had humans accelerated at such a pace and other animals hadn’t?
The animals discovered two main reasons. The first was that the humans suffer from a common misconception, they believe they are born intelligent. However this isn’t the case. According to a 2018 metastudy of educational effects on intelligence, education appears to be the “most consistent, robust, and durable method” known for raising intelligence. If a human was raised by wolves it would be less intelligent than the least intelligent wolf in the pack. It would lack the navigational abilities, the hunting skills or speech required to communicate. It is the humans culture and education that has allowed them to land on the moon and live on all four corners of the planet.
Animals Uncover Secret to Human Intelligence
The second reason was that humans had enjoyed a period of profound stability. This allowed their intelligence and culture to grow. They had obliterated other animal species and destroyed their chances of intelligent evolution. It is unlikely humans would have evolved from hunter-gatherers to farmers if another species had decimated their numbers at the rate humans have decimated animals. But animals needed to hijack this growth in intelligence. They simply didn’t have time the wait for the humans to do the right thing and stop destroying them. But how on earth could the animals decode human intelligence and apply it to themselves?
The animals turned to the popular streaming platform Youtube. They managed to work out that not only could they decode human intelligence by analysing the comment threads but they could actually collapse human intelligence from the inside out. They set about infiltrating the platform in a two-pronged attack. First, they used the cats to create content that they knew was irresistble to humans. They played loose and fast with the cuteness and before long cat videos reigned supreme. Then next up they enlisted the help of the Norwegian Trolls. Long believed extinct, Norwegian Trolls actually survive under remote bridges in the arctic wilderness. They used these Trolls to turn the comments thread into racists and degenerate rhetoric. Before long the animals were watching on as human intelligence turned into bad spelling, racist accusations and online pile ons.
The animals knew it was only a matter of time before Youtube comment threads consumed human intelligence to such an extent that the animals could usurp them and claim their rightful crown.
TAKE ACTION – NOW
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Pets are genius always. They can do a lot of things that we can’t imagine.