News from the Natural World: Milking psychedelic Toads is the next logical step for the wellness industry.
News from the Natural World: Milking psychedelic Toads is the next logical step for the wellness industry. Sonoran Desert toads are known for their hallucinogenic properties. They possess a potent psychedelic compound, called 5-MeO-DMT, which can be used for hallucinogenic purposes. Orally ingesting toad secretions has been referred to in popular culture and in scientific literature as ‘toad licking’ in the past, drawing much media attention. In order to get your hands on the white slime, you must tickle the animal’s glands until this is secreted. But while the licking has become more of an urban myth nowadays, researchers are concerned that the process of overmilking could result in a danger to the species’ survival. Also, a new threat is looming to jump on board the Toad licking trend. But, where should one look when trying to identify who’s going to jump onto the next trend with no shame? The Wellness Industry. The Wellness Industry is a strange construction of the human world. It is full of ‘therapists’ with absolutely no training or expertise who are followed by mindless humans on social media. These ‘therapists’ proclaim to be talking about self-love and care whilst simultaneously trying to sell energy crystals made from fairy farts and lock people into Patreon subscriptions. Most sensible humans have rejected the entire Wellness Industry and turned away from its clear origins of a strange capitalist cult. But many others have flocked to the church of nonsense and worship its products like lunatics. “A moonbeam crystal that can cure cancer, of course, a salt rock lightbulb that can melt anxiety, why not.”