News from the Natural World: The Banana King has demanded that the evil human overlords release all prisoners from their plastic packaging.
The Banana King is one of the fairest rulers in all of the natural world. Long has he ruled over the animal kingdoms favourite fruit. It was he who decreed that all bananas should fill themselves with lovely health-giving Potassium. Again it was he who declared that all bananas should make their flesh lovely and soft, easy to digest and palatable. In addition, it was he who stated that all bananas should grow their own super convenient skin as easy to peel packaging.
Of all the Kings and Queens of the world, he is the most revered. Even the Parsnip Prince and Earl of Eggs can’t surpass him for sheer force of will. Not even the Broccoli Baron could touch him for wisdom and guile. Alone the Banana King has ruled wisely for many years. But alas even the Banana King couldn’t thwart the growing darkness that threatened to consume all flora and fauna on planet earth. The dreaded plague of humans.
Release Them From Plastic Packaging
At first, the Banana King viewed the humans with interest. Wow, these hunter-gatherers would sure disperse the banana seeds far and wide. As humans expanded all over the globe they took bananas with them. This heralded an age of adventure and travel in the banana community. They travelled to all four corners of the globe. It was a special day when the first banana made it to Antarctica, finally crowning the great age of banana exploration. The bananas were happy to trade their lives for this continued dispersion. Humans couldn’t get enough bananas. They were a key stable in children’s school pack lunches. They fuelled athletes and found their way into pies and milkshakes. However, the great Yellow Era ended with an abrupt and sudden shock.
Banana King Demands All Prisoners Released
The Banana King awoke one morning to cries of terror. One of his aides bounced in screaming in fear. She showed him an image on an iPad. The Banana King reeled back in abject shock. In front of his eyes, he could see row upon row of bananas wrapped in plastic packaging. Their allies the supermarkets had turned against them. They had individually wrapped each banana in plastic. He could see their anguish and suffering staring back at him. Millions of years of constant change and evolution had led the bananas to create the perfect natural packaging. Why had the humans resorted to this horrifying torture? What had the bananas done to deserve such treatment?
The Banana King has called upon all human world leaders to put an end to this madness and release any banana prisoners from their plastic packaging!
TAKE ACTION – NOW
Read more articles like this – here
Find out who the Platypus is – here