News from the Natural World: Priti Patel demands to see the identity papers from Walrus who washed up in Wales.
Anthony Umoh aka The Dog has been out scouring the beaches of England to bring to you the latest tale of human species bastardism! Over to our favourite canine investigator…
“In England, the name Priti Patel is a well-known and feared name. She is a member of the human blue team, also known as the Conservative Party. She has been accused of bullying some of her staff in the last few months and some of her decisions regarding her international policy have come under question. One of which is very troubling to someone who recently ended up in Wales.”
The Dogs brow darkened as he continued… “This creature was a Walrus, and let me assure you that Walrus is not someone you want to pick on. He weighs 1000kg and can dive as deep as 90m below the waves. Despite how deep he can dive, Priti Patel is determined to find him and see his identity papers. Priti Patel has got bored of bullying her co-workers and now wants to pick on someone who weighs more than ten times her normal size. At least she is trying to progress to bullying someone bigger.”