News from the Natural World: Cowspiracy 2 is set to contain a grisly and terrifying twist that has left the animal kingdom reeling.
Cowspiracy was a shocking, yet humorous, journey of an aspiring human environmentalist. In the Netflix hit the human naively seeks to find the real solution to the most pressing environmental issues and true path to sustainability. You guessed it, the solution, making a hard-hitting documentary. That will really save the planet. Hang on? Surely mildly interested humans streaming programs in HD is one of many drivers of climate change (how do you think they keep all those servers cool). Anyway, I digress, really trying to see this from a humans point of view. Ok, so Cowspiracy totally changed the world and making a documentary is definitely groundbreaking. In fact, it was so groundbreaking that Netflix has greenlit a sequel so shocking the animal kingdom is reeling.
Colin the Cow to Star
Netflix wanted to turn the tables and has decided to cast Colin the Cow in the main role. The premise is simple, Cowspiracy 2 will feature Colin the Cow eating human burgers for 30 days straight. Now I know all you animals reading this will have dropped your breakfast but stay with me. All animals know that human meat is horrific. Their flesh is tainted by the poisonous greed that emanates from man’s heart. Some ancient animals recall that humans used to taste a lot better than they do now. In the past, it is said their meat was sweeter and almost palatable. But all that changed with the dawn of the 20th century. Man consumed vast quantities of salt, sugar, toxins, drugs, alcohol and tobacco. Then they added in fatty processed foods and vast quantities of microplastics and pollutants. All this led to human meat being the worst tasting of any meat in the natural world.