Peter the Pigeon
All those poor humans, I just never knew what an impact I’d had until now. They’d be all dressed up ready for work in their suit. Hair combed back looking all slick. Maybe it was their first day of work or maybe they were going on a date. Then thwack, right on the top of the head, a massive dollop of my poop. I think I told myself I wasn’t aiming for them but really, deep down I knew I was, oh the shame!