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Category: Agony Earth

Agony Earth – Find out what really grinds Mother Earths gears in the worlds first intergalactic cosmic agony aunt column.

Mother Earth has woken up to an absolute sh*t show on her lovely blue planet. Her celestial power nap went on for rather longer than she intended (2,000 years to be exact). Those bloody humans had really run amok. They’d ransacked all the oil, destroyed all the biodiversity and even eaten all the Dodo’s. What a mess!

Mother Earth had truly become Agony Earth and she was in so much pain and suffering and knew she needed to act. No longer could she sit by and watch as her beautiful planet rotted and decayed. So she did the only thing she could. She started her own agony aunt column!

So sit back and enjoy the latest stories from the world of Mother Earth.

This is Your Mother Earth
Agony Earth

This is Your Mother Earth, and YOU’RE ALL Grounded!

By The BeaverJanuary 13, 2021January 13, 2021
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Agony Earth

Mount Everest Guilty of Murder After Human Climber Perishes on the Summit

By The PlatypusDecember 14, 2020December 14, 2020
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Mother Earth
Agony Earth

Mother Earth Will Give Dinosaurs Another Turn after Giving up on Humans

By The PlatypusNovember 25, 2020November 25, 2020
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blue/green planet
Agony Earth

Will the owner of a blue/green planet please move it – it is overheating

By The PlatypusOctober 27, 2020October 27, 2020
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Agony Earth

“Mother Earth angry that humans think Octopus came from space”

By The PlatypusJune 16, 2020August 24, 2020
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Agony Earth

“Mother Earth admits that creating humans was an accident”

By The PlatypusJune 8, 2020August 24, 2020
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"Told me it was in a nice area he did. Said it was hip and full of great bars. Plenty of good schools and great transport links. F*cking estate agents!"
Tarsier admits that he might have been to a 'couple of raves' during his hedonistic youth, but as far as he can tell there were no adverse side affects.
Psychoanalysis of Octopus Abandoned after Discovering Each Arm Has a Mind of Its Own
Open More Loopholes - UK Government Releases Plan to Dump More Plastic Waste on Poorer Countries
Mayans Urge Conservationists to Change Their Tune, End of the World Alarmism Never Ends Well
Animals Uncover Secret to Human Intelligence By Decoding Youtube Comment Threads

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